What has our franchisor ever given us?

November 12, 2011

Running some meetings are more difficult than others.

You don’t have to slaughter all your dreams

December 20, 2010

Franchising dispels some dreams: some unrealistic dreams.

There’s lots left if you hold tight to your marriage and kids.

You don’t really lose anything. And the humour gets better and better.

Even building your castle on a swamp is ok if you’re lost together.

[Street Anatomy]

Unsafe at any Brand

August 1, 2010

Franchising’s only meant for immigrants and white trash, anymore.

Sure there are others that get in the wrong line, but they’re getting fewer and farther apart.

No respectable person wants to be a mom-and-pop franchisee anymore.

A Well Respected Man” is a song by the British band The Kinks, originally released on the UK EP Kwyet Kinks in September 1965…

[Ray] Davies composed the song based on a negative experience with upper class guests at a luxury resort where he was staying in 1965. He crafted the song to mock what he perceived as their condescension and self-satisfaction. Wikipedia


A Well Respected Man, The Kinks

‘Cause he gets up in the morning,
And he goes to work at nine,
And he comes back home at five-thirty,
Gets the same train every time.
‘Cause his world is built ’round punctuality,
It never fails.

And he’s oh, so good,
And he’s oh, so fine,
And he’s oh, so healthy,
In his body and his mind.
He’s a well respected man about town,
Doing the best things so conservatively.

And his mother goes to meetings,
While his father pulls the maid,
And she stirs the tea with councilors,
While discussing foreign trade,
And she passes looks, as well as bills
At every suave young man

‘Cause he’s oh, so good,
And he’s oh, so fine,
And he’s oh, so healthy,
In his body and his mind.
He’s a well respected man about town,
Doing the best things so conservatively.

And he likes his own backyard,
And he likes his fags the best,
‘Cause he’s better than the rest,
And his own sweat smells the best,
And he hopes to grab his father’s loot,
When Peter passes on.

‘Cause he’s oh, so good,
And he’s oh, so fine,
And he’s oh, so healthy,
In his body and his mind.
He’s a well respected man about town,
Doing the best things so conservatively.

And he plays at stocks and shares,
And he goes to the Regatta,
And he adores the girl next door,
‘Cause he’s dying to get at her,
But his mother knows the best about
The matrimonial stakes.

‘Cause he’s oh, so good,
And he’s oh, so fine,
And he’s oh, so healthy,
In his body and his mind.
He’s a well respected man about town,
Doing the best things so conservatively.

Blessed are the cheesemakers

July 27, 2010

I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can be worked out some way. I am a fool.

A great swindle of our time is the assumption that science has made religion obsolete. All science has damaged is the story of Adam and Eve and the story of Jonah and the Whale. Everything else holds up pretty well, particularly lessons about fairness and gentleness. People who find those lessons irrelevant in the twentieth century are simply using science as an excuse for greed and harshness. Science has nothing to do with it, friends.

Kurt Vonnegut 1922 – 2007

Sermon on the Mount, Matthew:

  1. Blessed are the poor  in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
  2. Blessed are the meek: for they shall possess the land.
  3. Blessed are they who mourn: for they shall be comforted.
  4. Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill.
  5. Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
  6. Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God.
  7. Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.
  8. Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

How shall we fuck off, oh lord?

April 20, 2010

Raj Patel is not the messiah.

Even though his new book, The Value of Nothing, seems pretty good.

Nemesis: Agents sent to create a downfall (hubris)

March 16, 2009

Great fun when IndFAs think they are strong enough to compete with franchisors.

Tremendous sport, really.

hubris n. 1 arrogant pride or presumption. 2 (in Greek tragedy) excessive pride toward or defiance of the gods, leading to nemesis.

Nemesis Gk Myth a goddess usually portrayed as the agent of divine punishment for wrongdoing or presumption (hubris)

nemesis n. (pl. nemeses) 1 esp. N Amer. a long-standing or persistent rival, enemy, or tormentor. 2 retributive justice. 3a a downfall caused by this. b an agent of such a downfall [Greek, = righteous indigantion, from nemo give what is due]

Franchise bankers are very, very good businesspeople.

December 21, 2008

sandallifebrianAnd I have come to the conclusion that I am not a nearly as good in business. Retraining is probably in order for 2009.

I think I have simply lost the desire that comes from calling the next Mr. Victim.

This realization substantially accounts for my continual CLMs (Career limiting move) in the last 10 years and my family’s resulting subsistence living.

  • It has precious  little to do with throwing sandals at a $1.1-billion sales per year North American franchise industry.

I should have persisted in my 6 week Canadian banking career but I have to be careful who I associate with. It would have been much easier for everyone, I suppose.

Oh well…

This is a good bit about those bankers who are still very keen about their careers.

Suing franchisees will Learn what the word Farce means

September 7, 2008

Ever wonder why there are so many unhappy lawyers? The best bit is at 7:37.

“Stringing a case out”.

  • Wondered why everyone says: “Better talk to a lawyer specializing in franchise law?
  • Because you do not know if you have a good case [law services are a credence good] you can easily be convinced that there is no hope or, taken on as a client until your cash flow ends and then discarded.

The Franchise Bar controls access to the Courts and routinely sabotages perfectly good cases. This is especially true in the smaller markets such as Canada, Australia and New Zealand. I have seen it dozens of times.

  • The law has been bought and paid for by Big Franchising but this is not such an unusual situation in public administration.

Franchisees who want to sue their franchisor will likely never see the inside of a Court. You should go to a civil court and find out how much of a joke it is. I love the law but dislike the practice of law very much.

  • There is no excuse for looking to the law for help: Franchisees and ex-Ees need to rely on themselves.

HELP! HELP! I’m being repressed!

September 7, 2008

Authority within societies has been justified in several ways over the years.

To assume that market forces support democracy or is neutral to it, is a very false notion. Historically, corporate interests do very well under totalitarian regimes, such as fascism or absolute monarchies. During WWII, companies such as IBM, Daimler Benz, Bayer and Fiat prospered.

The pretense of a functioning democracy is a very worthwhile image to keep citizens asleep.

  • Personally, I like that The Lady of the Lake gave a sign by choosing Arthur to wield excalibur. About as good as any other form of government, I reckon.

But this very silly bit shows may point to a more sophisticated truth: Maybe start thinking for yourself instead of just moving shit around?

  • Okay: You’ve been struck across the head with a sharp stick.
  • Something has happened that is “unfair”.
  • What are you going to do about it?

Monty Python and the Holy Grail, 1975

Words after a bit

WOMAN Well, ‘ow did you become king then?

ARTHUR The Lady of the Lake,
[angels sing]
Her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur
From the bosom of the water signifying by Divine Providence that I,
Arthur, was to carry Excalibur.
[singing stops]
That is why I am your king!

DENNIS Listen – strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

ARTHUR Be quiet!

DENNIS Well you can’t expect to wield supreme executive power just ‘cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!

ARTHUR Shut up!

DENNIS I mean, if I went around sayin’ I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me they’d put me away!

ARTHUR Shut up! Will you shut up!

DENNIS Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system.

ARTHUR Shut up!

DENNIS Oh! Come and see the violence inherent in the system! HELP! HELP! I’m being repressed!

ARTHUR Bloody peasant!

DENNIS Oh, what a give away. Did you here that, did you here that, eh? That’s what I’m on about – did you see him repressing me, you saw it didn’t you?

If the Oz Franchise Bar took over an Airline

August 28, 2008
  • Notice how being a pilot is a credence good just like being a franchise lawyer.

Not very funny at the time but black humour is a very, very effective way of coping with, at times, overwhelmingly negative emotions.

If you don’t do your interior work, you remain vulnerable and cannot properly grieve for the person you used to be.

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